Matt. she IS what she IS...

Okay, I must say that I find Ann Coulter to be an alarmist: a bickering fundamentalist in a perpetual state of political and social malcontent and humanistic denial. And yes, I find corporeal irony in the fact that she is arguably an anoretic ectomorph whose caustic, corybantic disposition literally transforms her into a most misanthropic, manipulative endomorph whose gauche social commentary, theatrical hair flipping and disaffected chuckling strives to exploit, promote and peddle division, derision, hatred, intolerance and fear into the guts of those of a more shall we say, bilious temperament; and sure she criticizes the underdog with a less than egalitarian view, in fact I find her utterly repulsive as a human being, but dammit I also find her incredibly entertaining.

Whenever I hear that she’s going to be interviewed and/or featured on a program I cannot help but find myself delighted to be setting the DVR to record whatever uncomfortable, foot-in-mouth encounter she is about to provide. Rush Limbaugh wishes he were this controversial, as he fails to proffer his version of hate and propaganda in an educated (albeit misdirected) fashion.

Here's the thing: Ann's insults are creative.

Rush’s arguments are entirely transpicuous and vapid, in that his cholesterol gargling falsetto screams of tyrannical desperation, in that he needs you—implores you—to buy his big bag of bullshit, for further proliferation of the white Anglo-Saxon elite literally depends upon it and further, he must maintain subliminal control over what Rush’s team surely calls the subservient riff-raff; that is, the white Anglo-Saxon middle/lower class who are too foolish to know when they are being indirectly insulted by their great leader.

Rush in fact feeds upon such compliance and conformity to his opinions, in that his ego requires that you kneel before the megalomaniacal, $33 million per year General Zod, if you know what I’m saying, as it will validate, fulfill and justify his sense of righteousness and power in the world. However, there is a pathetic urgency in his broadcasts; a sense of -I’m not right unless you believe I’m right- in his voice, wherein Ann Coulter doesn’t give a polemic shit whether you believe she’s right or not; she knows she right and that's all that matters. She doesn’t need your loyalty, submission, validation and/or ratings; she already has legions of conservatives from puberty to propecia jerking off to her 8x10 glossy head shot. I mean honestly, what more could she need?

Here is a clip of Ann’s latest appearance on The Today Show with Matt Lauer, although if you're going to take the time to watch a video clip, I would highly suggest that you hold out until the end of this entry, which was added as an update, wherein Coulter goes blonde head, to blonde head, to blonde head, to redhead, to wig, to dreads with the ladies on The View.

Anyway, I always look forward to Ann and Matt in an NBC, righteous indignation cage match. I usually find Matt’s moral outrage to be a bit exaggerated, wherein it seems as though the majority of his frustration lies in the fact that he just can’t seem to get her to see how morally reprehensible and insulting she is as a human being. Ann in turn ruffles Matt’s journalistic style in that he soon resorts to focusing upon absolutes and trivialities, a tactic which usually comes back to bite him in the ass, wherein she’ll whip out words like extemporaneously and refer to him as Matt Lauer et al.; somehow Matt manages to look like the lunatic in that he’s pleading with her to see that for which she has no interest in seeing: that she is a nasty human being: that she is caustic, controversial and morally repugnant.

Yes, that's true. But how is it relevant to the interview?

I say, let her bark, that’s who she is and always has been. I’ve never seen a journalist so ardently challenge Rush Limbaugh to his face as to why he’s such an egotistical bigot. Why does Ann Coulter have to play nice? Lauer is consistently condescending in his interviews with her in that he is dead set on challenging her as to why she’s so divisive, as opposed to why it is she thinks that way. He rarely lets her finish an answer, as he is obsessed with getting her to admit that the malicious content of her books are simply fabricated and included to garner attention and sensationalism.

Um, Matt? She’s written six wing-nut books, I’m quite certain that she believes what she’s saying and is in fact a nasty, malicious human being; let her ramble, the ratings will write themselves.

He needs to let go of the fact that a—what some may consider--attractive, leggy blond woman is sitting before him spewing hate and intolerance because there’s something very -Daddy’s-little-girl, very -pretty can’t be ugly- in his voice and inferences that just make me want to vomit and again, while I’m in no a way supporter of Ann Coulter’s hateful rhetoric, I take absolute offense to his patronizing -pretty can't be ugly- style.

MATT:
-Why won’t you just be nice, Ann? Why? Why can’t you just play nice?

ANN:
Well, because I’m a hateful, repugnant, right-wing ‘round the bend, conservative bigot, Daddy. I don’t want to play nice.

MATT:
-But you're too pretty to be ugly, you don’t really feel that way, Ann.

ANN:
Yes, I do.

MATT:
-But how do you know Ann? How do you know that liberals should all be burned at the stake? How do you know that Jews are imperfect and that 9/11 widows are greedy Jersey Girls? You don’t make $33 million/year on a radio show; you don’t have people kneeling before you, validating your cause, so how do you know that you’re right? How can you be certain and truly know that you’re a hateful, repugnant, right-wing, ‘round the bend, conservative bigot?

And like The Keymaker in The Matrix it’s simple:
Ann knows because she was meant to know.

Let it go Lauer. This is who she is.

jenji
UPDATE:
Ann appeared on The View this past Tuesday: need I say more?
Experience the hysterical contagion: the petulant, wing-nut, trichototillomanical hissy fit to the 6th power here.
It.Is.A.Freakin.Mess. And so very worth it.

Still relevant...

Suggested training and motivational video (see below) for:

FOX News employees
The Bush Administration
24-hour cable news "journalists"
Ann Coulter's team
Rush Limbaugh's team
Lou Dobbs' team
Tom Cruise
Entertainment Tonight
The Insider
Jena, Louisiana (yes, the entire town, just as a precaution)
Bill O'Reilly's team (see FOX)
an extremist of any flavor

...and all of those nasty, catty, self-righteous men and women that we've all been known to work, encounter, endure, interact and share genetic components with at the INSERT ENVIRONMENT HERE, while we're trying to INSERT OBJECTIVE HERE, yet it becomes increasingly difficult to do so, as some people can be such incredibly huge INSERT PROFANITY HERE!

...you know, those people at that place.



THE SNEETCHES (1961) Seuss

...to see the conclusion of The Sneetches and some still very relevant, Hitler inspired anti-overtones click here

...also, I've posted a new poll in the sidebar. Feel free to vote!

jenji

Smoke and Mirrors

As of late, I have seen and heard many individuals, particularly women, ramble on about how angry they are with Silda Spitzer and her so called pathetic, codependent choice to support her husband during the controversy surrounding Mr. Spitzer’s recent, imprudent behavior; or what I have come to call—Seriously Spitzer, Could You Be a Bigger Narcissistic Moron?

To some degree I can understand this critical assessment of Mrs. Spitzer, as I must admit to my own knee jerk reaction upon first seeing her standing catatonic beside Spitzer at the podium. In fact, for a moment I was livid, yet slightly disoriented as to why I would be so quick to judge another's situation, as it’s not normally within my nature to automatically do so, especially under such an extreme and depraved circumstance. So I was puzzled, if not slightly sickened as to my disparaging response.

Seriously, what kind of bug did I have up my ass that day? Although at the time, I must admit that I was riding out some nasty cold medication.

I mean, justifiably our anger and criticism should be directed toward Spitzer himself, but instead we posture aggressively toward Mrs. Spitzer. It is truly astounding how quickly we have taken our eyes off the ball or in this case—off the bald. After all, Eliot Spitzer is the hypocritical, adulterous, self-centered, narcissist who brought shame upon his family, not Silda. He is the aggressor, while Mrs. Spitzer and her three daughters are the victims, right?

So, why is it so easy for us to blame the victim?
As usual, it’s the media.

Upon reflection and in an effort to think outside the media driven box, I came to realize that I wasn’t at all upset with Mrs. Spitzer’s decision, but in fact with the media’s decision to methodically use and thereby assign a most subliminal term—“Standing By Her Man”—as the end all description for Mrs. Spitzer’s response; presentation of said subliminal term is of course complete with gripping graphic and melodramatic music required to further evoke drone like submission from the masses.

24-hour media loves the literal, injudicious picture. They would prefer not to truly think or deliberate, as both waste time, so the quicker to judge, think and/or deliberate (in fact manipulate), the quicker to air; the quicker to air, the higher the ratings; the higher the ratings, the more money they make. It’s a lava lamp of misleading, agenda driven information; hypnotic and painstakingly repetitive as it creates legions of disciples who are addicted and willing to depend upon 24-hour news as their definitive source for deliberative thought.

This tag: “Standing By Her Man," is an irresponsible assumption; a manipulative suggestion, with a rudimentary connotation that is entirely strategic, primitive and discriminatory in nature, while it leaves little room for interpretive discussion and/or deliberation. I mean as a viewer why bother with deliberation? There she is, demure and dutiful in her unassuming blue suit; complete with silk scarf accoutrement. She looks like an accommodating flight attendant: Can I get you a beverage Mr. Spitzer? Would you like a pillow Mr. Spitzer? Hot cloth Mr. Spitzer? The entire scenario is so 1950’s I could gag.

So I ask. Is she really “Standing By Her Man?”

I’m not blind. I mean I see her standing there, demure and seemingly devoted as ever, but is she indeed supporting him?

Hello? I’m talking to you 24-hour news. Did you bother to investigate the situation before smacking this simplistic, suggestive tag upon her response and presence? Surely you have the journalistic capacity to sniff out a reliable source that might offer some insight as to Mrs. Spitzer’s genuine motivation for showing up to this humiliating conference. After all, you hunt down sources to feed your incessant Britney stories; half a million reporters are strategically posted outside of Heath Ledger's loft waiting to get a shot of the velour covered mound (formerly known as Heath) as it/he is wheeled off into the coroner's vehicle. So what gives? Why this sudden, lackadaisical approach?

This tag: “Standing By Her Man," has become tiresome as politician after politician is compelled to believe that they are beyond the moral/legal law and further, entitled to break it: Senator Larry Craig, Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, Governor James McGreevey and Senator David Vitter just to name a recent few. And guess what? All of their respective wives could be seen “Standing By Her Man,” albeit looking as if they had just thrown up in their mouths a little bit.

But should we be surprised with this rush to tag behavior?

No. As usual, 24-hour news has failed society. It has failed to consider that Mrs. Spitzer’s presence may be indicative of anything other than spousal dedication; that “Standing By Her Man” may not at all be about devotion, but strategy. For all we know she has already hired an assassin to settle all this cheating nonsense—although Silda, I wouldn’t recommend the extermination route, as I’m sure that your husk of a husband is friends and/or plays poker with the majority of NYC hit men, I’m just sayin’.

Yet this 24-hour assessment of what is indeed assumed accurate should be expected, as deliberate manipulation or at least partial omission is a symptom of the sexist, agenda-driven, one-dimensional society that we live in, wherein the news presents what it is we are allowed to see, dictates what it is we are allowed to think and therefore learn about our roles in society. They are corrupt and far from impartial, as they are in bed with cooperate entities, and therefore, riddled with sexism, ageism and racism. As a convenient source for news, 24-hour news takes advantage of their viewers by providing subliminal anti-group-of-the-moment rhetoric, which we (or most of) society will perceive as the valid truth. We don’t even realize that we’re being discriminated against and molded into thoughtless drones; drones who are taught to recognize that a woman should indeed “Stand By Her Man,” no matter the indiscretion because that's what we do. Put on your best 2-piece tweed, accessorize and smile lady because that’s what you do. Rub your feet, Mr. Spitzer? Would you like another blanket, Mr. Spitzer?

So, as I listen to women criticize Mrs. Spitzer’s choice, I think to myself, huh, nice job 24-hour news, you’ve managed to blame the victim and thereby turn women against women, wherein they cannot come together and give Mrs. Spitzer the benefit of doubt, support, or even consider that she may have her own agenda as to why she’s “Standing By Her Man.” It’s a divisive, strategic tactic indeed, meant to keep the masses from thinking, bonding, forming, gathering and revolting against the cooperation and it works like a gem.
To see the true off her rocker jenji rant click here.

Look, I'm sure she has her reasons for standing alongside him at these press conferences, be it religion, her children, whatever. Perhaps she is a passive product of a patriarchal society, I don’t know. I’m not nearly as psychic as Sylvia Browne suggests each one of us might be. My point is that we truly can't predict what it is that Mrs. Spitzer may be feeling and going through during this particular crisis anymore than we might be able to predict her favorite flavor ice cream. However, we might consider that there may be more than one explanation for her behavior; even Neapolitan has three flavors.

So, let's deliberate for a moment.

Here’s a question: Has anyone stopped to consider that Mrs. Spitzer is merely protecting her children who have been emotionally abandoned and traumatized by their father's disgraceful indiscretions? That as a matter of protection she may in fact be determined to keep their world as consistent as possible by postponing the feminist solution—to publicly scorn and vilify their father—as it would only serve to further exacerbate these abandonment issues for her children; is that possible? Could this be a Mama Lion at work?

This is just a theory, but it is entirely plausible that Mrs. Spitzer might be gathering all of her energy to provide a stable constant; a parent that her vulnerable children can actually depend upon and trust.

So what’s the solution, jenji? You must have some sort of alternative title/tag up your sleeve that 24-hour news can implement in an effort to describe her response, one which might somehow remain neutral, while still presenting the situation?

Oh, it’s not a tag at all. The solution is that he/she who has deceived, wandered and/or strayed should be holding these conferences solamente, sans the spousal distraction so that we may then concentrate all of our energy upon the true jackass of the moment.







<---true jackass of the moment

Then I should think the tags would be quite easy to create--literal even. The problem for the 24-hour graphics department is that these tags would constantly change, as do the deceitful aggressors. What a kick in the pants for graphics.

Still, I should think that these tags would read something like this:

Governor Spitzer Will Now Talk Out Of His Ass and Admit Felonious Activities

Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick Admits to Boning His ex Chief-of-Staff

Governor James McGreevey Admits Homosexuality and Buys Property on Fire Island

Senator Larry Craig Admits Incontinence, but Insists That His Bladder Is Not, Nor Has It Ever Been Gay

Senator David Vitter Admits DC Madam Is On His Christmas Wish List

Do you see what I’m saying? Now that’s simplistic and literal! The graphics department can thank me later.

I'm just sayin', take a moment to truly deliberate, to think outside of the media driven box and resist the mesmerizing, hypnotic, 24-hour lava lamp of complacency; consider as many sides of the issue as possible before you harangue and blame the victim. Make an effort to wade through the thick, 24-hour bisque of the day and whether vituperative or supportive in the end at least you’ve taken the time to interact before you react.

A bit of advice for Eliot Spitzer: although Mrs. Spitzer has been victimized she still has the capacity to react as anything other than a victim, for most mothers would agree—betray me and we may be able to work this out, betray my children and you’ll find yourself wishing you had never been born.

jenji